Again, I just have to start off by mentioning how happy I am for my mom for finally (probably!!!) finding a job. Congratulations, Mom. I love you and you deserve it.
NOW!
Something old: my blog
Something new: my blog's layout.
While I have to hand it to myself (Hand what to whom? It to myself.) for making the color scheme of this new layout a great throw back to my old theme and just a cool scheme period, I am disappointed in the outcome. I thought I'd be able to change the layout and keep the color scheme but I was mistaken. Terribly mistaken. Not only can I not apply my old (much loved and missed) color scheme to this layout, I also cannot get my old color scheme back if I were to switch the layout back. I mean, I could if I really wanted to but who has the time for that? Not I, not I.
ALEC:)
Oh, and I'd like to apologize in advance for my liberal agenda! Sorry.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Friday, March 26, 2010
Dada
Dada is the best thing to ever happen to art. Art is only good if it is offensive. Beautiful art gets a second look but offensive art gets a second thought. Dada art was so offensive.
Where are you? No, like, really... where is everyone?
First of all my mom has a hot lead on a job. A hot lead? Did I make that up? Whatever. She could have herself a job very soon. Like, this Monday soon. I'm more excited than she is...
Secondly, Michele Palmer, you have stopped blogging and that's no good. I love your blog (and your obsession with Andy) and I miss it. So get back to work.
Third, if you move with music because you have been told to move with music, moving with the music is counterproductive. You have to feel it for yourself. If you sway with your instrument because you have been told to do so, then you will look like an idiot since the movements are not (I know this is tacky but I don't know how else to say it) from the heart and you will sound like an idiot as well since you are thinking about how you are moving and remembering to move so you don't get yelled at by someone and not letting the emotion of the music make your motions for you.
Fourth, the third nine weeks is a bitch.
Fifth, I really think I do have that seasonal effectiveness disorder thing! When there is more sun, I am happier. When there is less sun, my attitude about everything is just like Miley Cyrus and how she moves her hips. I'm just like 'Yeah...'
Sixth and last, I need comments. I hate when I don't get any comments. I love comments. And, like I said, I need them. If you don't comment, I don't write because I feel like I am just writing to myself. Yes, this invitation is extended to my mom's friends, as well. You will not embarrass me. And if you do, I'll just blog about it and make fun of you. (:
Later, lovers.
Secondly, Michele Palmer, you have stopped blogging and that's no good. I love your blog (and your obsession with Andy) and I miss it. So get back to work.
Third, if you move with music because you have been told to move with music, moving with the music is counterproductive. You have to feel it for yourself. If you sway with your instrument because you have been told to do so, then you will look like an idiot since the movements are not (I know this is tacky but I don't know how else to say it) from the heart and you will sound like an idiot as well since you are thinking about how you are moving and remembering to move so you don't get yelled at by someone and not letting the emotion of the music make your motions for you.
Fourth, the third nine weeks is a bitch.
Fifth, I really think I do have that seasonal effectiveness disorder thing! When there is more sun, I am happier. When there is less sun, my attitude about everything is just like Miley Cyrus and how she moves her hips. I'm just like 'Yeah...'
Sixth and last, I need comments. I hate when I don't get any comments. I love comments. And, like I said, I need them. If you don't comment, I don't write because I feel like I am just writing to myself. Yes, this invitation is extended to my mom's friends, as well. You will not embarrass me. And if you do, I'll just blog about it and make fun of you. (:
Later, lovers.
Friday, March 12, 2010
A Tale or Two, some Propositions and Observations, and an Announcement
I haven't blogged in awhile so hold onto your undergarments for the vacuum of kick ass I am about to deliver is sure to suck the rest of your clothing right off.
TALE ONE
ALEC: Did you know Obama smokes?
MOM: Yes. He isn't perfect. Close, but no cigar. Well...
PROPOSITION ONE
I think that women should, for one day every month (and without warning), make their husbands stay home and do all of the housework. This would result in the man questioning his masculinity and therefore everything else in his life. Women would get a clean house and men would get a day of reflection.
PROPOSITION TWO
One's IQ should be a factor in determining when one can receive one's drivers license.
OBSERVATION ONE
I hate Walgreens and I love CVS and I don't know why.
OBSERVATION TWO
I love declining friend requests. It's a natural high for me. It makes me feel powerful. Even better- removing someone from my friends list. If I decline your friend request then you were never good enough for me to begin with but if I remove you, HA!
TALE TWO
ALEC: Mallie, did you remember to...
MALLIE: No!!! Leave me alone about it.
ALEC: Fine, I'll write about it on my blog.
(MALLIE goes and does what I told her to do. And she rarely forgets to do it anymore.)
OBSERVATION THREE
I love it when people I don't like get bad hair cuts. Is that terrible?
PROPOSITION THREE
There should be eight days in a week. The number seven bugs me. And the number eight is so nice.
ANNOUNCEMENT
I will be running for president eventually.
A HAIKU (It's my blog, I'll do what I want, thanks. I know it wasn't in the title... get over it.)
Five syllables, shit!
How can I be profound? Meh...
I give up. Four. Five.
PROPOSITION FOUR
Flip flops should only be worn by males in cities with beach access. Mom, I'm moving to Miami now.
OBSERVATION FOUR
Most people consider families with 'too many children' to be families with one more child than they had whe they were growing up.
OBSERVATION FIVE
No great TV shows are on on Wednesdays.
OBSERVATION SIX
The only people that annoy me on Jeopardy! are the ones who look like they don't know that much but then they know, like, everything.
PROPOSITION FIVE
People shouldn't have to pay late fees. They should just not be able to get new things (whether it be from Blockbuster, you public library, or Rent-a-Center) untill they return what they think they need for an extra long time.
OBSERVATION SEVEN
I'm running out of ideas.
I'll bring sexy back tomorrow... I'm tired today.
ALEC!!!!!!! (:
TALE ONE
ALEC: Did you know Obama smokes?
MOM: Yes. He isn't perfect. Close, but no cigar. Well...
PROPOSITION ONE
I think that women should, for one day every month (and without warning), make their husbands stay home and do all of the housework. This would result in the man questioning his masculinity and therefore everything else in his life. Women would get a clean house and men would get a day of reflection.
PROPOSITION TWO
One's IQ should be a factor in determining when one can receive one's drivers license.
OBSERVATION ONE
I hate Walgreens and I love CVS and I don't know why.
OBSERVATION TWO
I love declining friend requests. It's a natural high for me. It makes me feel powerful. Even better- removing someone from my friends list. If I decline your friend request then you were never good enough for me to begin with but if I remove you, HA!
TALE TWO
ALEC: Mallie, did you remember to...
MALLIE: No!!! Leave me alone about it.
ALEC: Fine, I'll write about it on my blog.
(MALLIE goes and does what I told her to do. And she rarely forgets to do it anymore.)
OBSERVATION THREE
I love it when people I don't like get bad hair cuts. Is that terrible?
PROPOSITION THREE
There should be eight days in a week. The number seven bugs me. And the number eight is so nice.
ANNOUNCEMENT
I will be running for president eventually.
A HAIKU (It's my blog, I'll do what I want, thanks. I know it wasn't in the title... get over it.)
Five syllables, shit!
How can I be profound? Meh...
I give up. Four. Five.
PROPOSITION FOUR
Flip flops should only be worn by males in cities with beach access. Mom, I'm moving to Miami now.
OBSERVATION FOUR
Most people consider families with 'too many children' to be families with one more child than they had whe they were growing up.
OBSERVATION FIVE
No great TV shows are on on Wednesdays.
OBSERVATION SIX
The only people that annoy me on Jeopardy! are the ones who look like they don't know that much but then they know, like, everything.
PROPOSITION FIVE
People shouldn't have to pay late fees. They should just not be able to get new things (whether it be from Blockbuster, you public library, or Rent-a-Center) untill they return what they think they need for an extra long time.
OBSERVATION SEVEN
I'm running out of ideas.
I'll bring sexy back tomorrow... I'm tired today.
ALEC!!!!!!! (:
Thursday, March 4, 2010
The best and worst week ever.
This week has been amazing and terrible. Who knows why? Not me.
So, on Monday night, I had full orchestra rehearsal which is never fun but it wasn't THAT bad this week. Also on Monday, I had a sub in computer apps which is a waste-of-time class as it is... need I say more? Uninterrupted Text Twist for an entire hour. Can I get a what what?! WHAT WHAT?! Hmmmm... nothing else really happened on Monday. OH! Yes, something else did happen on Monday. We did a lab in chemistry and I was in a group with a bunch of smart girls and they saved my ass from failing that heat reaction measurement yield change shit.
On Tuesday my week picked up BIG TIME. This started when I walked in on a guy and a girl having sex in the guys bathroom during SMaRT period (which, uh, whoever decided SMaRT period was a good idea was kind of asking for something like this to happen if you ask me). You can't make that up... I mean, you could but you'd have to be really sick to make that up. Like, even sicker than I am. Okay, so I get in there and there is the couple in the handicapped stall (Okay, time out: imagine a special needs kid rolling into the bathroom on a power scooter only to find the handicapped stall occupied by two hormonal morons... Shoot. Maybe I would be sick enough to make something like that up.), a guy taking a dump in the middle stall, a guy pissing in a standy uppy toilet (I know what they're called, I just have no clue how to spell it, sorry.), and a guy checking his hair in the mirror by the door. So my thought bubble is like, 'They can't be having sex... they're just making out and they'll leave soon; they won't want to get caught and the tension and awkwardness in this restroom cannot allow for any sexual fun.' So my dumb ass goes to the open stall and pops a squat. I HAD TO POO! So anyway, I am sitting there and I hear, well, you can imagine it for yourself. So, just to make sure my presence is known, I cough. And this was a super fake cough. It was a cross between a hum and a 'Yooooo hoooo' kind of thing. I don't know why I thought my attempts to get their attention would be productive; if you're having sex in a bathroom at school, I think it's fair to assume that not much is going to stop you. So I get up to leave (without ever doing my business... ugh...) and on my way out, I look at the stall just to see if my ears are deceiving me and sure enough they were not. Sticking out from under the stall was a pink backpack. Idiots. Okay, so, believe it or not, this was only half of the excitement of Tuesday. Even better than this sex scandal (which is kind of worse than Carmel's, if I do say so myself) was my Jeopardy! test!!!!!!!! That bitch was fun. I had questions on all of my favorite topics. Words with certain letters in them. MTV shows. Chamber music. Just to name a few. I doubt I'll get a call back but it was hella fun. Then, when I was in bed on Tuesday night, I had a total melt down. I realized my mom has no job. I have known this for awhile but it's sinking in now. I realized I have no job. I realized I might not get into IU. I realized I don't trust enough people. I realized that there are good reasons for me to not trust many people. I was crying. It was not fun.
Okay so on to Hump Day. Worst day of orchestra of my life by a mile. I can't even really talk about it without saying things I shouldn't. Once the school year is over, though, I'll write a whole blog entry about all of my 'experiences' in orchestra this year. That entry will not be very funny. Oh. And I had a chemistry test and a pre calculus test on Wednesday and I was ready for none point none none percent of either of them. I got a B- on the chemistry test though so that's not bad, I guess...
And today is Thursday. It has to be good. I have a sub in computer apps again and he told us that if he catches us goofing off he will kill us. He is my new favorite sub. Also, Thursday night TV is the best. The Office, Parks and Recreation, 30 Rock, and The Sarah Silverman Program. I don't know what else you could ask for.
Tomorrow... who knows? No one knows. It'd be a waste of time to experience tomorrow if anyone knew what was going to happen.
I love you all.
And I mean that.
And I need you to love me too.
Thanks.
So, on Monday night, I had full orchestra rehearsal which is never fun but it wasn't THAT bad this week. Also on Monday, I had a sub in computer apps which is a waste-of-time class as it is... need I say more? Uninterrupted Text Twist for an entire hour. Can I get a what what?! WHAT WHAT?! Hmmmm... nothing else really happened on Monday. OH! Yes, something else did happen on Monday. We did a lab in chemistry and I was in a group with a bunch of smart girls and they saved my ass from failing that heat reaction measurement yield change shit.
On Tuesday my week picked up BIG TIME. This started when I walked in on a guy and a girl having sex in the guys bathroom during SMaRT period (which, uh, whoever decided SMaRT period was a good idea was kind of asking for something like this to happen if you ask me). You can't make that up... I mean, you could but you'd have to be really sick to make that up. Like, even sicker than I am. Okay, so I get in there and there is the couple in the handicapped stall (Okay, time out: imagine a special needs kid rolling into the bathroom on a power scooter only to find the handicapped stall occupied by two hormonal morons... Shoot. Maybe I would be sick enough to make something like that up.), a guy taking a dump in the middle stall, a guy pissing in a standy uppy toilet (I know what they're called, I just have no clue how to spell it, sorry.), and a guy checking his hair in the mirror by the door. So my thought bubble is like, 'They can't be having sex... they're just making out and they'll leave soon; they won't want to get caught and the tension and awkwardness in this restroom cannot allow for any sexual fun.' So my dumb ass goes to the open stall and pops a squat. I HAD TO POO! So anyway, I am sitting there and I hear, well, you can imagine it for yourself. So, just to make sure my presence is known, I cough. And this was a super fake cough. It was a cross between a hum and a 'Yooooo hoooo' kind of thing. I don't know why I thought my attempts to get their attention would be productive; if you're having sex in a bathroom at school, I think it's fair to assume that not much is going to stop you. So I get up to leave (without ever doing my business... ugh...) and on my way out, I look at the stall just to see if my ears are deceiving me and sure enough they were not. Sticking out from under the stall was a pink backpack. Idiots. Okay, so, believe it or not, this was only half of the excitement of Tuesday. Even better than this sex scandal (which is kind of worse than Carmel's, if I do say so myself) was my Jeopardy! test!!!!!!!! That bitch was fun. I had questions on all of my favorite topics. Words with certain letters in them. MTV shows. Chamber music. Just to name a few. I doubt I'll get a call back but it was hella fun. Then, when I was in bed on Tuesday night, I had a total melt down. I realized my mom has no job. I have known this for awhile but it's sinking in now. I realized I have no job. I realized I might not get into IU. I realized I don't trust enough people. I realized that there are good reasons for me to not trust many people. I was crying. It was not fun.
Okay so on to Hump Day. Worst day of orchestra of my life by a mile. I can't even really talk about it without saying things I shouldn't. Once the school year is over, though, I'll write a whole blog entry about all of my 'experiences' in orchestra this year. That entry will not be very funny. Oh. And I had a chemistry test and a pre calculus test on Wednesday and I was ready for none point none none percent of either of them. I got a B- on the chemistry test though so that's not bad, I guess...
And today is Thursday. It has to be good. I have a sub in computer apps again and he told us that if he catches us goofing off he will kill us. He is my new favorite sub. Also, Thursday night TV is the best. The Office, Parks and Recreation, 30 Rock, and The Sarah Silverman Program. I don't know what else you could ask for.
Tomorrow... who knows? No one knows. It'd be a waste of time to experience tomorrow if anyone knew what was going to happen.
I love you all.
And I mean that.
And I need you to love me too.
Thanks.
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